Resistance is such a scary word these days!
Jackson is in the hospital... again... and his infection is resistant to the IM meds he usually gets.
My girls are home with Nan and Poppop and my heart is broken that our family is not together...
again.
I should be getting them off of the bus in 15 minutes - I promised them I'd be there to get them today. (We were supposed to be D/C'd last night).
But, I am here at the hospital still because Jackson now needs 2 days of IV antibiotics and they have been unsuccessful at getting an IV, thus far.
Jason is here too, yet I feel disconnected from him, almost alone.
I realize that I am stressed out...
Gray hair, 30 lbs overweight, acne, shedding...
I often think about running around the hospital while he's sleeping,
or doing sittups while he's playing in bed.
But instead, I sit here dwelling on the issues, searching the internet for more info, drinking my Cokes and eatting my chips.
Just think... I could have burnt 50 calories by now!
And my house... oh golly, oh geez.
Makes me actually feel like a "failure" that I can't keep the dang thing clean.
This is my fault.
I keep telling myself "I should've raised these kids right" to put their stuff away.
I get more than frustrated with Jason.
But I, myself am a slob, I've learned.
We are so dang busy that nothing gets put away, the floors haven't been mopped in weeks, and the laundry: it piles up dirty and then it piles up clean.
Mom is coming next week... Boy would I be embarrassed if she showed up early, And my poor Mom... she's picking up the girls for me and has to TRY to find them a clean matching outfit at the house. uuughhh
So, if anyone out there knows the secret to successfully being a good Mom, having time to have fun with the family, working, being involoved with the girls' school, making dinner each night, cleaning up dinner each night, keeping the house actually clean (not just straightened up), picking up everyone's dirty laundry, cleaning and folding the laundry, feeding the baby his bottle every-other hour around the clock, getting the kids to their activities and having time to hang out with your husband... PLEASE let me know!!!
They're here to try an IV again...
Guess that means my pity party is over...
and I was just getting started;)
So, if anyone out there knows the secret to successfully being a good Mom, having time to have fun with the family, working, being involoved with the girls' school, making dinner each night, cleaning up dinner each night, keeping the house actually clean (not just straightened up), picking up everyone's dirty laundry, cleaning and folding the laundry, feeding the baby his bottle every-other hour around the clock, getting the kids to their activities and having time to hang out with your husband... PLEASE let me know!!!
They're here to try an IV again...
Guess that means my pity party is over...
and I was just getting started;)
2 comments:
Oh Jenn. I so wish we were all close so we could help you out. Don't feel bad about not keeping the house clean! You've got a son that's been in the hospital what seems like more days than he's been out of it. I don't think anyone expects you to be perfect! We all love you!
Don't be embarrased on account of my coming. I wasn't perfect and I did not have a baby getting infections on a regular basis, in and out of hospitals, trying to sneak some time in for your job, etc. etc. etc.! When I was in school, my laundry went from the washer to dryer to laundry basket. That is where my kids looked for their clothes. Occasionally, I'd get them folded and then they sat folded for the next week before I could get them put away. Relax and just worry about Jackson. The girls and I can take care of the house, school work, laundry, etc. It is one of those times in life where you just set priorities! And everything can't be a priority at the same time.
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